I think I've always had this conscious awareness of my interior life. Maybe being an introvert has something to do with it. I seem to be far more aware of what's going on INSIDE me than I am of what's happening AROUND me. My vision impairment might contribute to this "disconnect" with the importance of being aware of my surroundings. I am so intently focused on what I'm doing that everything else kind of blurs like the background of a well-taken photograph.

I knew how I treated myself and it mirrored how others treated me, bullying peers and critical adults. After many years, therapy and inner healing, my relationship with me is far better. My initial response is still to be negative toward myself but I don't stay in that space as long as I used to.

I know my soul very well now compared to years ago, what my strengths and faults are. I know what triggers me to seek comfort in sweets and what helps me resist following that icy incline to a binge. I know what "works" for me in certain situations, why I avoid conflict, and why I have such a passive stance toward almost everything that happens in my world.

I'm aware of what I could work on changing in myself and of all the reasons why I do or don't want to do that. I'm very clear about what is not in my control and why I've no interest in those things despite the criticism of control-freaks in my orbit.